#sorry if i got anything wrong its um. kinda off the cuff here

[mewguca]

1 and 22!!

1. Could be a lot of characters really but I guess the main two are both good candidates here

though of course everyone's interpretations are gonna be different and headcanons influence that a lot too!

I think a lot of people tend to write off the depth of these two though, and not necessarily on purpose...

A lot of people think of Moon as being the sweet type who's secretly scary when mad and super strong blablabla but...like

she wasn't able to stand up to her own brother until it was too late...She's a very passive person. She kept trying passive means of getting him to stop until she finally forced a communication that just resulted in him getting mad at her and blaming her for ruining everything...as an admin over Pebbles she realistically had the power to try to stop things much sooner or more forcefully

but she just isn't really a forceful person...she isn't secretly really powerful and strong and someone you shouldn't mess with...she's just tired and sad and irritable and frustrated and hurt but trying her best to be happy and live as well as she can

She tries really hard to be kind and good and fair and do her job properly and be helpful...

And maybe that's good enough, idk...it makes me feel better at least

That maybe you don't have to be secretly really strong or whatever for people to take you seriously and respect you. Maybe it's okay to be weak and kind. idk

And Pebbles...he has a lot of remorse for his actions. The guilt is literally eating him up from the inside. He's not just mean and angry and hates everyone!!!! He just is incapable of asking for help. He's too prideful. But he's prideful in the sense that he cannot stand anyone looking down on him or pitying him...and he can't admit he was wrong. So he just kinda gives up. He resigns himself to his fate without even trying to reach out to his local group again and apologize...

He is clearly very pained thinking about what he's done. Even in arti's timeline, he remarks he hopes that [the rot] won't spread to moon. He's generally concerned about how she is doing, but he doesn't have the courage to ask. He's very scared, I think. He tends to internalize things and withdraw into himself. It makes the rot really fitting lol...

By the time he is able to accept asking you for help, his structure has started collapsing. It takes him a REEAAALLLY long time to overcome that flaw of his.

But I also really don't like the idea that he's some helpless little baby or whatever...it kinda diminishes the inner turmoil he is experiencing and the weight of his guilt. He did this. He hurt himself and his sister. He damaged things irreparably. To try and absolve him of his sins rubs me the wrong way. Pebbles is such a great character because he is flawed. Because he is not a good person. Because he does bad things and hurts others. Because that's how real people act. The exploration of his feelings of guilt and how he represses his emotions to try and cope with them would be far less interesting had he not done something substantial enough to warrant this sort of reaction...

So please don't try and take his agency away!

Of course I havent played saint yet (though ive read somewhat about it) and I can't always remember all the dialogues off the top of my head so take it with a grain of salt haha...

everyone will have different headcanons and views and stuff though haha once again...

lemme make another post for the other one...

[ladyanput]

Seeing Green Ch.10

Quick warning: there is one threat of suicide in this chapter.

''You'll always be mine, my lady…''

Marinette sat up abruptly in bed, her body drenched in a cold sweat as her breathing came out harsh and fast. She closed her eyes and tried to control her breathing, her hands tightly gripping the bed sheets. 

She forced herself to calm down. Chat- No, Adrien could not get her here. He was in jail, he didn't have his Miraculous anymore, there was no reason to panic. She was with the Waynes, they'd protect her, she'd protect herself. Adrien couldn't hurt her anymore.

Marinette opened her eyes and gazed around the large room Bruce had situated her in. It was the fanciest room she'd ever had the pleasure of staying in, with its massive size and the bathroom being almost as big as the bedroom itself. She never had a bubble bath before, but she'd taken the chance to have a nice, relaxing bath with bubbles nearly overflowing out of the tub, even though the water had stung the rope burns around her wrists.

Marinette gingerly touched her bandaged wrists, then glanced over towards her bedside table, the numbers 3:27 casting a faint green glow from the clock. Maybe some hot chocolate would help calm her down. She slid out of the plush bed and silently made her way through the labyrinth of a mansion until she reached the kitchen.

To her surprise, she found Tim sitting at the table in the center of the room, typing away on his laptop, with dark shadows visible under his eyes. Marinette eyed the coffee mug next to his laptop as she made her way into the kitchen.

"What are you doing up? Aren't you tired?" Mari made her way over to the electric kettle on the counter and quickly flipped it on when she saw it was full of water. Tim glanced up and rose a brow at the sight of the Parisian girl, then gave a wry smile.

"When you get tossed around by a man-child in a leather catsuit, you're not really up for sleeping, especially when your room is right next to Jason's and you hear some rather suggestive noises." He stated dryly, then chuckled at the sight of Marinette's face going beet red from his words. "Why are you up?"

"I… I had a nightmare." She admitted, raiding the cupboards until she found the hot chocolate powder and got to work on her hot chocolate. "I think I'll be having them for a while."

"You probably will, Angel." Damian appeared in the doorway, his hair mussed and wearing only a pair of pyjama pants that had little Robin logos all over them.  He made his way over to her and wrapped a supportive arm around her waist, drawing her close. "With what you went through, anyone would."

Marinette snuggled into her boyfriend's warm embrace and found herself with a dopey grin on her face. The nightmare seemed to fade from her mind as she felt Damian kiss her, making her shiver ever so slightly.

“Aren’t you all supposed to be asleep?” Eva stepped in, wearing only a fluffy robe. Marinette chuckled at the sight of the woman’s messy hair and general unkept appearance. “Though, I suppose I should be too.”

“Kinda hard to sleep with hearing a headboard slamming repetitively on the wall.�� Tim piped up dryly, shooting the woman a withering glare as she opened the fridge and took out a bottle of water.

“Well, Tim, if you ever wanna join in, I’m more than open to it.” Eva sent him a wink, causing the boy to go red, even his ears. “Hey, sugar cookie, you okay?”

“Yeah… Yeah, I’ll be fine.” Marinette met the pitiful look in Eva’s eyes and felt her gut clench. She’d have to get used to that look in everyone’s eyes for quite some time. Even Bruce and Dick had been giving her those looks the entire evening, making her feel like crumpling into a mess of tears.. But she wouldn’t do that, not to anyone, she just had to get things back to normal again, she’d have to find a new Chat Noir, get back to Paris, find Hawkmoth, and then she could just move to Gotham and be happy.

If only things were so easy.

“Your parents are already on their way.” Eva’s voice cut through the rapidly messy thoughts and Marinette quickly busied herself with making her hot chocolate, ignoring the raw guilt in her gut that began to hurt. She hadn’t called her parents the entire time she’d been in Gotham, what kind of daughter did that?

They deserved a better daughter. Paris deserved a better Ladybug. Then maybe she would have seen the signs of Chat’s unhinging, maybe she could have prevented it. Now he was sitting in a cell, all alone, and it was all her fault, because she didn’t do anything to save her partner.

She quickly noticed the silence in the room and looked up to see everyone staring at her, as if expecting a response. Marinette quickly put on a bright smile and nodded, picking up her hot chocolate.

“I can’t wait for them to get here! I want to introduce them to everyone, especially Damian. I know they’ll interrogate you, but I’m sure you’ll pass the test.” Mari kissed Damian’s cheek, then quickly headed towards the kitchen door, her heart pounding wildly in her chest now. She felt tears brimming her eyes, which only heightened her frustration as she quickly made her way back to her bedroom. Tikki was awake and waiting for her when she got there. “Oh, sorry Tikki, did I wake you?”

“No, not at all Marinette. How are you feeling?” The kwami flew over to her chosen and smiled when she smelled the sweetness of the hot chocolate. She sat on Marinette’s shoulder as the girl settled in a chair by the window, staring out at the moonlit night. “You seem very calm.”

“Of course, silly, why wouldn’t I be calm? I’m on a fantastic field trip, dating the sweetest guy on Earth, and everyone is happy!” Marinette’s tone was cheerful, but Tikki saw right through it in a snap. She had watched as Alya and Lila accused Marinette of drugging Adrien and setting him up for this entire thing, she’d watched as Caline Bustier had done nothing to try and soothe Marinette, instead she went to try and calm a cry Lila as she kept making outlandish claims. And the kwami had watched as Adrien had been hauled away in cuffs, and once he had awoken he had started screaming about him and Ladybug were soulmates.

Tikki silently wished them all the worst luck in their lives, they didn’t deserve her good graces after all they had done. She was about to say something, but a knock on the door drew Marinette away, leaving the kwami sitting on the windowsill. She watched as her chosen opened the bedroom door and could easily make out the form on Damian, smiling sadly as she saw Marinette fall into his embrace as he opened his arms.

The couple laid on her bed for quite some time, just holding onto each other in comfort. Soon the sun began peeking over the horizon, filling the room with a warm light. Damian ran a hand over his girlfriend's hair as he watched her. He had known the moment he'd seen her in the kitchen that she hadn't slept right and wasn't going to for a while.

"I'm sorry." Marinette's soft voice broke the stiff silence as she laid her head on his chest, listening to his beating heart. "I should have seen it coming. I'm the Guardian of the Miraculous, I should have known."

"Angel, you're not to blame for any of this. You did nothing wrong." He tried to assure her, planting a soft kiss on her forehead as he felt her tremble. "He took advantage of you, of your kindness. He took advantage of your forgiving nature and manipulated you and then kidnapped you. Angel, he never once called you by your name when he was arrested. He kept calling you Ladybug."

Marinette had noticed that too. She hadn't been 'Marinette' or 'princess' once during the entire kidnapping. Chat Noir had become so unhinged, he had only seen Ladybug, he had only seen the mask he had forced upon her. She shivered in disgust at the thought.

"But still, I was his partner, I should have seen this, I should have stopped it." Marinette whimpered, hugging Damian tighter. Damian, seeing her tender, forgiving heart, felt pity for her. She could not shrug this off as easily as he could.

"Nothing could have stopped that. He was sick from the very beginning, no one to teach him right from wrong." Damian slowly sat up, taking her with him. "How about today, we spar before we head to the police station?"

…

The duo was surprised to see the training room was in full swing; walking in just in time to see Evangeline being sent flying towards a pile of mats, landing in them with a heavy thud and a loud groan leaving the woman.

“You need to balance more. You won’t always have your powers as a crutch, Eva.” Kate smiled as she made her way over to the scowling T.A,  helping her stand.

“I know, I’ve just never thought I was gonna become a superhero.” Eva snorted, standing and stretching her body, clad in a pair of yoga pants and a sports bra. Her dark hair was up in a messy bun, giving anyone looking the sight of the bruises and bite marks along her skin. Her vividly purple eyes landed on Marinette and she beamed. “Good morning, sugar cookie!”

“Oh… Um, good morning. Are you training too?” Marinette smiled, though she fiddled gently with the zipper of her hoodie, feeling a bit unsure as she saw the entire Wayne family was there. She watched as Dick did chin ups, Bruce beating up a very abused punching bag, and Jason pumping iron.  She nervously gulped. “I can do this another time, it’s okay.” 

“Hey, I wanna see what you’ve got.” Kate spoke up, stepping onto the exercise mat as Eva took a seat on one of the benches off to the side. “You’ve been a hero for a while, I’m sure you’d want a bit more training, so you won’t always be dependent on your magic, right? Maybe go up against Cass here? Just an easy sparring round, whoever gets pinned first loses.”

Marinette eyed Cass’s body carefully, seeing the strong muscle and amazing power in that sleek body of hers. Wordlessly, Marinette nodded and shrugged off her hoodie, not noticing as Damian tried not to swallow his tongue.

Marinette was no longer that slim, shy fifteen year old she had been when she had first become Ladybug. She had trained herself to become strong, to become the hero Paris deserved. She was still rather short, but she had certainly grown,  her sports bra straining ever so slightly against her chest, her arms flexing to show off the strong muscle, and Damian could see the powerful muscle in her thighs, and her abs… Well, they just made Damian feel weak in the knees.

He shook his head, blushing in shame. The girl had just been kidnapped and assaulted yesterday, yet here he was ogling her. He cleared his throat and took a seat beside Jason, ignoring his brother's playful nudge.

Cass and Marinette took their starting stances, then went at each other when Bruce signalled for them to begin.

They both fought hard, many watching as one dodged blows from the other, though it was clear to everyone, even Marinette herself, that Cass was the superior fighter here. Not surprising, as she had been raised to be the ultimate killing machine, just like Damian. But it was Cass who came out on top when she managed to kick Marinette's feet out from under her and pinned her down in seconds. The Waynes clapped and whistled.

"You did quite well against a trained assassin." Damian commented casually as he made his way over and helped Marinette to her feet. "Your center is a bit off, amongst other things. But we can help you train, Angel, get better. Trust me, it will help you."

Marinette grinned and nodded, then felt herself blush as Damian took her hand and walked with her to where most of the equipment was held. The family watched the duo, before exchanging looks.

"They've got it bad." Jason grinned as he saw the looks the two were sending each other when the other wasn't looking. "It's like a couple of lovestruck puppies."

Bruce chuckled softly at the sight of his son coming out of his shell around the French girl. While his son had outgrown that bratty part of him that had come out as a result of becoming an adult far too soon, he was still a recluse with his emotions. But seeing him smile so brilliantly, though it was directed at Marinette, made Bruce feel content.

He couldn't wait for grandchildren.

And one hour of punching a punching bag with Chat Noir's face taped to it, with the poor bag sadly beaten to a messy pulp on the gymnasium floor by everyone in the room, they made their way down into the Bat Cave. The entire group of vigilantes suited up, before turning towards Eva and Marinette, then eyeing the jewelry they wore.

"So those turn you into your superhero selves?" Tim spoke up, skeptically eyeing the necklace dangling from Eva's neck.

"Yes, they allow us Kwami to lend our chosen our powers." Tikki smiled, sitting promptly on Marinette's shoulder. It felt nice not having to be always in a purse or jacket around these people, it felt so freeing. "Marinette is by far my strongest Ladybug yet. She can handle immense power, she's worn several Miraculous at once."

Okay, now it sounded like she was bragging, which she rightfully deserved with all she had put up with. 

"And I finally have a kit." Trixx piped up, warmly nuzzling Eva's cheek. Marinette blinked in surprise when Eva and Trixx looked their way, their eyes both the same shades of vivid purple. "And it's all thanks to Marinette that I found her. Alya was a good fox, but her versions of the truth are… Misguided."

Marinette didn't comment, feeling an ache in her heart at the memory of her broken friendship. All of her class was back at the hotel with Miss Bustier, many of them shaken by their experiences in Gotham. It would certainly be a trip to remember for the Parisian group, especially for the likes of Nino.

Nino. Marinette cursed under her breath and turned towards Eva. 

"Nino broke up with Alya and apologized to me." Marinette blurted out before she could stop herself. "I want him back as Carapace."

"Are you sure about that Marinette?" Eva crossed her arms and seemed to ponder the outburst carefully. "He didn't protect you or side with you for how many years? Given, he wanted to remain loyal to his girlfriend, but still. I would go rushing back towards anyone who's asked for forgiveness, Marinette. They deserve your anger and mistrust for what a lot for them did to you, especially Nino. You told me you'd known him since you were little kids, remember? He should have known you the best and been there for you."

Marinette was quiet after that, not paying attention to the others listening in on their conversation. After a few minutes, she let out a defeated sigh. 

"I'm sorry, I am just… Everything is messy in my head. I just want everything to be normal again." Marinette closed her eyes and rested her head against Eva, who hugged her gently.

"Things won't ever be normal again, sugar cookie, I'm sorry. Maybe we should look into getting you a therapist." That got everyone staring at Eva. "What, surely you guys have someone you can talk about the traumatized shit you guys have been through, right? You don't just go around with this baggage weighing you down and tormenting you."

She was greeted with silence. Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped.

"Jesus fuck, guys, that isn't healthy! That can fucking destroy your mental health!" 

"I can contact Black Canary." Batman spoke up, looking uncomfortable under the woman's harsh, judgmental gaze. "I mean, she's a trained therapist, I go to her from time to time because… Because she understands because she's also a hero."

"Finally, someone with some sense." Eva grumbled, before setting her hands on her hips. "Marinette is going to see her, understand? No arguments, no complaints."

No one said a word, until Dick cleared his throat.

"Shall we head to the police station so that Ladybug can give her statements?" Nightwing stated uncomfortably, as Eva transformed into Lady Vixen, resulting in a wolf whistle from Red Hood. 

"Yeah, let's go." Marinette transformed, then smiled over at Robin. "Hopefully you can behave yourself there."

"Why should I? I still wanna skin him alive." Robin growled softly, his hand resting on the handle of his sword. 

"I'd rather you not commit murder, please?" Ladybug begged softly, giving him a sweet smile. "I have more kisses for you if you behave."

Robin snorted and shook his head, motioning her towards his bike. 

"Let's just go, before I turn soft on the guy who kidnapped you and held you against your will." He said dryly.

Ladybug smiled, but when she turned her back to everyone, tears brimmed her eyes.

…

The police station was a flurry of activity, the usual for a city full of supervillains and roaming vigilantes.

Ladybug smiled once Batman pointed out Commissioner Gordon, making her way towards him and shaking his hand.

"Hello Commissioner, it's lovely to meet you. I heard there was an incident of a girl getting kidnapped because it was thought she was me." Ladybug smiled sadly, being led into Gordon's office. "I am sorry for the inconveniences that were caused."

"Adrien Agreste did kidnap a girl, yes, saying she was you. We got her statement and she is staying someplace safe, don't you worry." The commissioner assured her, then crossed his arms, looking thoughtful. "He keeps shouting about he is Chat Noir, miss Ladybug. I don't really know about who you are, but Batman informed me that you are heroes in Paris?"

"Yes, we've been keeping the entire situation in Paris tight lipped due to safety reasons." Ladybug spoke up quickly, her face looking grim. "And I will admit, the entire situation is rather messy."

"Was he Chat Noir, this other hero that he's been ranting about?" Gordon met her gaze. Ladybug didn't say a word, but the look in her eyes spoke volumes. He knew exactly why she was there."I see… Would you like to talk to him? I can give you a few minutes, if you'd like."

"I'd appreciate that, thank you." Ladybug smiled sadly. She was here to say goodbye to her partner, and also hopefully to stop any spread of her identity, if he were to go back to Paris. She could only hope.

Gordon guided Ladybug and Lady Vixen into an interrogation room, while Robin, Red Hood, and Batman watched with the commissioner on the other side of the glass.

Adrien was lead in, dark shadows under his eyes, his hair messy and greasy, and a look of distaste crossing his face once he caught sight of Vixen, though it brightened at the sight of Ladybug.

"My lady, you're here! Thank goodness, you finally see reason and you're here to get me out! Then we can go back to Paris, right?" Adrien grinned, not even fazed as he was roughly shoved into the chair across the table from the heroines.

"No, Chat Noir, I'm here because I heard you were terrorizing a poor girl, thinking she was me." Ladybug scowled as she crossed her arms, trying her hardest not to tremble as his eyes, eyes such a vibrant color of green, met hers. "Marinette was in tears when she told me everything."

"Don't be silly, Ladybug, I know you're her. I saw you with your kwami the other night." Adrien soon got a dreamy smile on his face, gazing up at the heroine. "You have such a lovely figure, my lady, you've really worked hard."

It took everything in Ladybug not to spew the bile that rose in her throat, but she held it all down.

"Marinette was feeding my kwami cookies, Adrien. I had to go to that warehouse and help Batman and the others save her from you, remember?" Ladybug snapped, feeling her fury rise in her chest. "You have been acting out a lot over the years, but this takes the cake! You're lucky I managed to get her out of that warehouse while Lady Vixen distracted you!"

Adrien then focused his eyes on the silent fox that was leaning back against the two way mirror. Her fox ears flicked ever so slightly as she caught him staring. She merely grinned, showing off the sharp fangs in her mouth.

"What happened to Rena Rouge?" Adrien glared, crossing his arms and hunching his shoulders. "She's a much better fox."

"You're changing the subject, Adrien. You did horrible things to Marinette, you think you're owed my love, when I've told you time and time again that I love someone else!" Ladybug's voice rose an octave as she grew more furious, but then she took a deep breath and stepped back. He couldn't hurt her. Looking at him, she could clearly see he was delusional, he wasn't worth her guilt, her tears. "I'm done with you, Adrien. You're not worth my time."

It was as if reality had finally struck the Agreste boy. He teared up and got to his feet, though her couldn't move far thanks to being cuffs to the table 

"No, my lady, please! I love you so much, we're soulmates! I can't live without you!" Adrien's eyes welled with tears as he struggled to get to her. "Please, Ladybug, please! You're my lady and I'm your loyal knight."

"Let's go, Ladybug. He's not worth this." Vixen set a hand the small of Ladybug's back, carefully guiding her out. But just as they were about to step out, Adrien let out a scream.

"I'll kill myself if I can't be with you, Ladybug!"

That made Ladybug and Lady Vixen freeze. The guilt swamped the former like a tidal wave, guilt and shame rushing over her as she fought back a sob as she looked back at him. This was all her fault, she had hurt him this deeply. She couldn't hurt him anymore, she-

Lady Vixen stormed her way up to Adrien and grabbed him by the throat. She ripped his cuffs from the table and slammed him so hard against the glass, many webs of cracks covered it.

"You do NOT ever fucking say that to anyone ever, you abusive, selfish, manipulative piece of SHIT!" Vixen got right in his face, baring her fangs and hissing, appearing like a feral wild animal. "I should tear out your vocal cords right here and string them up your ass so you can keep talking shit!"

"Vixen!" Batman rushed into the room and pulled the fox off of the teen, sending Adrien sprawled across the floor with bleeding scratch marks at his throat. "That's enough!"

"No, he's not going to manipulate her like that! You don't guilt and scare someone into a relationship, you low life!" Vixen screamed at Adrien as she was dragged out of the room and the precinct.

Once outside, Batman set her down, but grasped her shoulders in a bruising grip.

"You crossed a line. You don't threaten a perp like that, that could cause legal action against you, or worse; make the public see you as an unhinged sociopath." He growled at her, giving her a firm shake. But Vixen was too busy hyperventilating. When she looked up, her pupils had become thin slits and tears brimmed her eyes.

"Doll?" Red Hood stepped forward, a hand reaching out for her. Vixen slapped his hand away and darted off into the night.

"Just let her go." Ladybug spoke up, sadness strong in her tone, though she would later regret that decision. "Just give her some space. Let's go home? Please? I just… I want to forget everything that happened in there."

As the night went on, an orange mist began to spread through the city, emanating from a frantic, hyperventilating heroine.

Taglist:  @realrandomposts @interobanginyourmom @ladybug-182 @ladylb @zalladane @mochinek0 @persephonebutkore @urbanpineapplefarmer @vixen-uchiha @angelofmusickaterinapetrova @thewheezingbubbledragon @northernbluetongue @violatiger8 @thequestionablyhuman @ginamarie1512 @maude-zarella @2sunchild2 @saphiraazure2708 @ayuchan07 @virgil-is-a-cutie @thepeacetea @mindfulmagics

[soopranatural]

Who I was looking for -Part 18

Summary: Even after you started wearing cuffs, the words are engraved in your mind as well as your wrist. You know you're not destined for love as soon as you learn how to read. How could you? When the words "Sorry, you're not who I was looking for" are written in black ink on your skin.

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: angst, pining, insecurity, etc

Words: 1779

A/N: I seriously meant to post this yesterday but I slept all day oops

Marsterlist

Mobile Masterlist

Part 17  Series Masterlist

Your name: submit What is this?

"Alright Tin-Man, what is it?"

They're in the hallway now, mainly so they can escape the renewed noise of the common room. As soon as Bucky had spoken, a hush fell over the room. It was weird for him to speak to Stark, and Bucky was known for being aggressively independent, never asking for anything even if he needed it. He was glad they had moved to the hallway, he was a little embarrassed, but he still wanted to ask.

He turned to look behind him, the door to the common room was ajar, and he could see Steve and Natasha lurking on the other side, he huffed and turned back to Stark.

"I need a jet" he spoke with no preamble, better to get it over with.

Tony raised an eyebrow, surveying him slowly as if searching for bad intentions. There was a glint in his eyes that looked teasing, but that might have been his imagination. Or maybe that was just a Tony Stark thing, a permanent teasing look.

"What for?" That was almost definitely fake innocence Bucky heard in his voice. Bucky grit his teeth, he hated when Stark acted like he knew something that he didn't, but he really needed this.

"I want to..." he sighed, ran a hand through his hair,

started over "Y/N has to leave for her hometown in a hurry. I'd like to take her, it's kind of an emergency." Bucky doesn't remember ever speaking this many words in a row to Tony Stark.

Tony's smirk widens and Bucky suppresses a growl.

"You have to forgive me if I don't trust you with a jet, old man. But-"

"I'll pilot the jet" The two men turn to look at Natasha, who is standing behind the open door and next to an open-mouthed Steve. She shrugs before speaking again, her voice nonchalant. "I was looking for an excuse to go outside anyway. Besides, everyone keeps telling me about the girl James is crushing on, I'd like to meet her."

"I'm not crushing on her" Bucky murmurs, but he's secretly doing somersaults on the inside. His chest is tight with excitement, and he can't help the small smile that blooms on his face.

"Well look at that" Tony exclaims. He looks at Natasha, then at Bucky. "Fine then, but bring it back in one piece" he aims this last part at Natasha, who only smirks and motions for Bucky to go with her.

Steve shakes his head with a smile and goes back into the common room.

-

"So" Natasha's tone is deceivingly nonchalant "Y/N"

Bucky hums noncommittally, helping her adjust the controls on the jet before takeoff. She flops onto the pilot's seat like it's a living room couch.

"Yeah, spill. I've been trying to set someone up for ages, but Rogers won't cooperate" she grins. "Tell me everything"

"There's nothing to tell Nat, she works in the tower" she perks up at that, ooh-ing at him, he ignores her "She's nice." He finishes, wanting her to stop looking at him like that.

"Oh, c’mon James, she has to be something more than nice if I'm flying this jet"

He gives in, knowing there wasn't a point in trying to keep something from her "She's kind, and hilarious, and frankly adorable. She sees me as Bucky, y'know? Not a monster, or a teammate, or a soldier, or even an avenger. I guess I kinda miss people looking at me like a person" he huffs, looking away when he sees Natasha glancing at him with those dewy eyes she looks at him with sometimes, when he's being particularly depressing.

She hums, then turns on the engine.

-

Nat makes fun of him when he realizes they took off without knowing where you lived. Luckily, they were already close by and arrive in a matter of minutes.

He looks for you as they land, and he finally sees you, bursting from the side of the building, your face frozen in a shocked expression. He knew you hadn't believed him.

"She is pretty" Natasha comments, a smile pulling at the corner of her lips as she opens the door for him.

You give a loud, incredulous laugh when you see him, your wide eyes glimmering with childish astonishment. Bucky's heart expands, pumping wildly in his chest at the sound of your laughter, it's the first time he's smiled this big in a long, long while.

He basks in your gleeful expression, and feels weirdly proud of putting that look on your face. When he takes your bag you seem to not notice, and remain standing outside, gawking at the sleek aircraft.

"What a cutie" Natasha smiles, and Bucky's glad to get the approval of one of his best friends, he beams at her and she gives a surprised laugh. "Oh boy, you really are a goner aren't you?"

He ignores her, and places your duffel inside a compartment near the floor.

"You coming?!" He shouts, cupping his hand next to his face so he's heard over the sound of the roaring engine.

"Oh! yeah! Hah! Oh my god" Natasha snorts behind him. You give an excited wiggle and there's a nearly painful tug to his chest. You step onto the aircraft, looking around with your mouth half open, Bucky can see you taking everything in, looking at the inside of the jet like you're in an art gallery. When you take off you squeak softly in excitement, then in fear when Natasha speaks from the pilot seat and startles you.

"Hi" she grins "nice to meet you, I'm Natasha. I'd shake your hand but we'd probably crash if I do that." Your eyes widen, looking at Natasha curiously and maybe a little nervously. "I've heard a lot of good things about you." She says pointedly. Bucky gives her a warning glare that he knows she caught, even if she doesn't turn his way.

"You have?" Your voice comes at an unusual high pitch "I mean, nice to meet you too. Thank you so much for doing this"

Bucky can't tell what's wrong. Maybe it's nothing, or maybe it's the stress of the day that's getting to you, but your voice is a little strained when you talk to Natasha. And your eyes look almost... sad?

He moves closer to you.

-

You arrive at your hometown almost two and a half hours later, and Bucky's a tad disappointed that it went by so quickly. He isn't about to say anything to you though.

The ride was quiet at first, but Nat had made an effort to spark a conversation (thank the heavens for her, he'd have to buy her one of those gooey brownies that she liked when they got back). It had worked, because soon all three of you were talking and laughing. He enjoyed the way your expression changed when you listened to them tell stories of their past missions, looking almost like you were watching a super interesting movie unfold right before your eyes. You'd relaxed around Nat too, and he breathed out in relief when he caught you giggling uncontrollably at the Budapest story.

"I'll have to meet Clint someday" you gasped, holding on to your stomach.

Natasha made a considering noise "Oh, he'd love you. Maybe I'll invite you guys for coffee someday"

You choked on your next breath, your mouth dropping open with a faint pop. You were about to speak but were cut off when Natasha spoke again.

"We're here"

You stood up in a flash, and Bucky handed you your bag while Natasha landed the aircraft at the hospital's parking lot.

Nat reached upwards and flipped a switch, which caused the door to open with a sharp hiss.

"You guys saved my life today" you said sincerely, shouldering the duffel. You grinned up at Bucky, stepping closer and then immediately stepping back. "Um, can I hug you?"

Bucky's breath punched out of his lungs. He couldn't believe you. You wanted to hug him, and that was a surprise on its own. But the fact that you asked? Search his face kindly to check if he was comfortable? It made his heart ache with a sudden burst of... something.

He couldn't speak, so he only nodded at you. You stepped forward again, confidently this time, and wrapped your hands around his waist in a tight embrace.

You were warm, and soft, and your shampoo smelled like coconut. Your bag hit him in the ribs, but he couldn't care less. It felt like comfort, something he hadn't had for many years, not for real at least. He shut his eyes tightly and tried as best as he could to absorb the feeling through his skin.

You pulled apart after a long moment, one that felt too short anyway, and smiled at him before shouting your goodbyes to Natasha and then sprinting off the jet.

"Wow" breathed Natasha.

"Yeah" Bucky said back.

-

They watched you be greeted halfway through the parking lot by a tall, dark skinned man who swept you into a tight hug before ushering you inside.

"She has a soulmate" Bucky blurts without thinking, keeping his eyes on the glass door even after you disappear from sight.

"What?!" Natasha snaps her gaze to him "that him?" She points towards the hospital entrance, then flips the switch that closes the door.

"I don't thinks so. I don't think she's met them actually, she wears a leather cuff because she doesn't like her words." He sits down on the floor and leans on a wall.

"Well that sucks"

He hums in agreement but doesn't say anything. He's thinking about that man he saw you hugging, he really had no idea who he was, or who you were, for that matter. He didn't actually know anything about you, and who knows, maybe he was your soulmate. It wouldn't make a lot of sense for you to not live in the same place, but it was still a possibility. Maybe it wasn't him, but you could have already met them and just hadn't told him anything. Jealousy churned uncomfortably in his gut and her frowned at himself.

"Why haven't you said anything then? Is it because you're embarrassed?" Natasha says, interrupting his train of thought.

"I'm not embarrassed" He really wasn't. He was against telling the team at first because he knew they wouldn't leave him alone about it, but he had never been embarrassed of liking anyone, and wasn't about to start now. He wanted to tell you, the problem was that he couldn't. It was just better for everyone involved if he kept his feelings to himself.

Part 19

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[marshmallow-the-vampire-slayer]

MTVS Epic Rewatch #168

BTVS 6x16 Hell’s Bells

(aka the Xander-and-Anya-were-having-it-way-too-easy-this-season-and-it-was-high-time-they-got-their-lives-ruined episode)

Stray thoughts

1) 

WILLOW: Buffy, it's hideous. Oh my god, Buffy. Look at its arms! BUFFY: I know. But it's my duty.

Why did Anya get them these awful dresses, though? That’s such a crappy cliché - the bride having awful bridesmaid dresses made because she’s the only one who can look beautiful at her wedding - and I hate that they had Anya do that. Also, notice that Buffy’s dress is slightly less awful, so I’m guessing Sarah pulled her weight to have it that way.

2) Yet another example of how people in Sunnydale are bound to believe anything in order to remain oblivious of the supernatural.

BUFFY: I just can't believe everyone bought that story about Anya's people being circus folk. Did you see the guy with the tentacles? What's he supposed to be? Inky the Squid Boy?

3) Why did they want these people at their wedding, though? 

WILLOW: And Xander's family. I haven't seen them that bad since my bat mitzvah. Ugh, did you see how much they drank? BUFFY: Kinda. Mr. Harris threw up in my purse

4) Of course, following Anya’s declaration of how that day was the happiest day of her life, we see the going-ons at the Harris’s household��� and this is what we get a glimpse of…

His uncle Rory half-naked suggesting Xander should use Velcro in his cuffs.

His uncle Rory trying to make himself an Irish coffee (in the morning…) and then pretending to get electrocuted.

Xander’s father giving him a hard time because he’s not ready yet

Xander’s mom guilt-tripping him about her not getting to be in the pictures (why did she think that?)

Krelvin recalling how Xander’s father had compared him to his mother-in-law and then proceeded to hit him and insult his heritage

Xander’s father making fun of Anya’s whole family

Xander’s cousin Carol asking him to get her date with “Kevin” while wearing Xander’s cufflinks as earrings. 

I ask again, why did they want these people at their wedding? Except for Krelvin, he seemed like a cool dude.

5) I love how Buffy takes care of Xander and then shows how truly happy she is about him and Anya. 

BUFFY: Look at you. You look great, Mr. About-To-Get-Married. Glowing.Oh my god! Maybe you're pregnant!

XANDER: Maybe. I dunno. Maybe I'm just happy. Teary.

BUFFY: Oh! Good. Good teary. XANDER: Happy teary? Not frustrated with bow-tie teary? BUFFY: Yes. Happy. Happy for you. That makes me happy for me. You and Anya give me hope. It's like... you two are proof that there's light at the end of this very long, long, nasty tunnel.

6) Ugh these two flirtatious vixens!

7) Anya’s vows attempt #1

ANYA: 'I, Anya, promise to love you, to cherish you, to honor you, but not to obey you, of course, because that's anachronistic and misogynistic and who do you think you are, like a sea captain or something?  I do however entrust you with my heart. Take care of my heart, won't you please? Take care of it because it's all that I have. And, if you let me, I'll take care of your heart too. I'll protect it and tend to it, like a little stray.' Wait, no. 'Like a, a little mangy stray that needs a home.'

And as funny as each of her attempts were, there was always so much of her heart in them, which makes everything that happens afterwards so much more heartbreaking.

8) “It's just I'm so excited and I want to share it all with my best friend. I get to be with my best friend forever! Yay!” 

9) Why would D’Hoffryn attend Anya’s wedding, though? Don’t weddings go against everything he believes in, sort of?

10) My trash son being his usual trashy self… 

11) Let’s be real, Xander was unconsciously looking for someone to tell him  this and confirm his fears and doubts…

OLD MAN: You can't get married today. It's a huge mistake.

12) Xander’s dad is all like “I paid for this so shut up” or something, and I’m like ?????? He paid for the wedding? 1) Why? Really, why would he? He didn’t care for his son, he had Xander pay for rent the minute he turned 18 and have him move to the basement. 2) How? I always got the impression the Harris’s weren’t exactly can-afford-a-wedding wealthy...

13) So these are the glimpses we get of Anya’s and Xander’s “future”…

Xander has decided to follow his dad’s footsteps and become a drunk.

Anya is a cosmetics salesperson for some reason. What happened to the Magic Box?

Xander had broken his back trying to fight a battle alongside Buffy. Buffy died in said battle. She wasn’t brought back, apparently.

Anya thinks Buffy’s death ruining their lives. 

Anya owns a pink car.

Pretty early into their marriage, Anya cheated on Xander with a demon and got pregnant. They stayed together, and Xander raised the girl as his own.

Xander and Anya stop having sex after Buffy died, for some reason...

In spite of everything, they were married for 30 years.

It really does seem like this fake future is a mixture of Xander’s own fears about marriage, his insecurities and his misconceptions about who Anya is.

14) I both love and hate that these two started acting mature once they were broken up. She’s finally being honest and treating him with respect, and he’s acting out but he still shows he cares about her feelings… 

SPIKE: It's a happy occasion. You meet my friend?

BUFFY: No. Not yet. But she seems like a very nice attempt at making me jealous. SPIKE:  Is it working? BUFFY: A little. It doesn't change anything... but if you're wildly curious, yeah, it hurts. SPIKE: I'm sorry. Or, Good! You want us to go? BUFFY: No. No, I... you have every right to be here. I pretty much deserve... SPIKE: That's not true, you... God, this is hard. BUFFY: Yeah. SPIKE: I think we'll go. BUFFY: Go where? To your place? SPIKE: Yeah, I suppose. That was the idea. BUFFY: Yeah. SPIKE: Evil. BUFFY: Of course. SPIKE: But I won't. Or I...  I'll just go. Give 'em my best or whatever. The happy couple. BUFFY: I will. SPIKE: It's nice to watch you be happy. For them, even. I don't see it a lot. You, uh... you glow. BUFFY: That's because the dress is radioactive. I should... SPIKE: Yeah. But it hurts?

BUFFY: Yeah. SPIKE: Thanks.

BUFFY: You're welcome.

15) I love the callback to “Homecoming”…

WILLOW:  You're getting married. My little Xander. XANDER: All growed up. WILLOW: It's a good thing I realized I was gay, otherwise, hey, you, me and formal wear...

16) Anya’s vows attempt #2

'I, Anya, promise to cherish you...' Ew, no, not cherish. Uh, 'I promise to have sex with you whenever ... *I* want, and, pledge to be your friend, and your wife, and your confidant, and your sex poodle...'

17) I LOVE YOU BUFFY, YOU PRECIOUS UNICORN.

BUFFY: Uh, sorry about that. Um... there's just gonna be a little bit of a delay. ANYA: Why? What's wrong? BUFFY: Nothing! Nothing's wrong, it's just, um, it, the minister. He had, uh... to g ... and perform an emergency C-section. ANYA: A C-section?! 

BUFFY: Yeah! You know, he's, uh, not, not just a minister, he's also a, a doctor. You know, he's half-minister, half-doctor, he's a mini-tor. Not, of course, to be confused with a minotaur! Because he's all, you know, man, this doctor minister man, no bull parts whatsoever.

18) Anya’s vows attempts #3 

'I, Anya, want to marry you, Xander, because... I love you and I'll always love you. And... before I knew you, I was like a completely different person. Not even a person, really... and I had seen what love could do to people, and it was... hurt and sadness. Alone was better. And then, suddenly there was you, and... you knew me. You saw me, and it was this... thing. You make me feel safe and warm. So, I get it now. I finally get love, Xander. I really do.'

19) Buffy trying to stall the wedding is my favorite thing ever, okay?

And Clem being a supportive marshmallow…

20) Also, I low-key ship these two. 

21) These two are super horny amidst the whole family feud, love it.

22) It’s actually odd that there weren’t more people coming to get their revenge on Anya, don’t you think? 

DEMON: You did this. You brought this on. I've waited a long time for this, Anyanka. ANYA: Who are you? DEMON: Remember Chicago? South Side, 1914? Stewart Burns. Philanderer! You'd think you'd remember. I remember you. But then again, you ruined my life.

ANYA: You were a ... I punished you. DEMON: That's right. Some hussy I'd been taking around summons you, next thing I know, I look like this and I'm being tortured in another dimension. ANYA: I forgot. DEMON: Well, I didn't.

Also, this is a very interesting character moment for Anya. She feels almost ashamed she’d forgotten about him. For so long she had focused on exacting revenge on those she deemed deserved it and yet she had never paused to think of the ripple effect her acts had on those people. She had probably ruined thousands of lives, and they weren’t even an afterthought to her. And more importantly, did all of them truly deserve it? And who was she to decide they did?

23) And I’m always a sucker for Buffy ripping her skirt to fight!

24) So Xander comes back… 

And he helps save the day… 

But the damage was done. Well, it wasn’t “damage,” really. It was Xander owning up to how he really felt…

ANYA: So... we're ready now. Let's get married.

XANDER: I... I'm not. I'm not ready. I can't, An, I'm sorry.

ANYA: But it wasn't real. What he showed you, it wasn't real.

XANDER: I know it wasn't real. But it could be.

ANYA: What was it? Was it about me? 'Cause he wanted you to hate me, Xander.

XANDER: It wasn't you. It wasn't you I was hating. I had these thoughts, and ... fears before this. Maybe we just went too fast.

ANYA: Look, everybody has thoughts. It's natural, it doesn't mean that, that getting married is wrong.

XANDER: I know, I know...

ANYA: Look, you're just shaken up, okay? You just calm down and we'll start over, okay?

XANDER: We can't start over. If this is a mistake, it's forever, and... I don't want to hurt you. Not that way.: I'm sorry. I am so sorry.

And even though it was extremely bad timing to call off the wedding right before it took place, this might be one of the rare moments in which I 100% have Xander’s back. He wasn’t ready, and he knew it for a long time. I think he was hoping that by the time the wedding approached, he’d be ready. But that didn’t happen. I think a lot of it has to do with this line “It wasn’t you who I was hating.” More than anything, he was afraid he’d be his father’s son and become a lousy husband and a despicable human being. And I get why he wouldn’t want to be that person with Anya. He did love her, that much I’m sure of. And he took the getting married thing seriously. He knew he wouldn’t back away, no matter how ugly it got. So, yeah, bad timing. But right call.

25)  But.. this… wasn’t really gentlemanly of him, though… 

Leaving Anya to break the news to everyone all on her own after breaking her heart? Not cool…

26) And this whole scene is so sad and beautifully shot…

D'HOFFRYN: It's time you got back to what you do best ... don't you think?

[poisonedfortunecookie]

Bind Me To You

 @sasuhinasno1fan never got a shance secret santa gift so I am here to provide the gift of shance, no one shall go without. Sasu I hope you like this little fic 

Title: Bind Me To You

Summary:  After another failed attempt at getting closer to Allura Lance ends up hand cuffed to Shiro. The key can't be found and Lance refuse to miss out on his beauty sleep to look for it. They two end up having to share a bed and while Shiro stays awake all night, too afraid to sleep in case Lance ends up finding out about his nightmares SHiro ends up hearing something he wasn't supposed to.

[AO3 link]

or read under the read more

“Remind me again how we ended up like this?” Shiro asked tiredly pinching the bridge of his nose his eyes screwed shut. Beside him Lance squirmed but didn’t offer up an answer.

‘Patience...patience…’ Shiro chanted like a mantra to himself.

“Oh right because you decided to try and pull some foolish stunt with Allura and I stopped you,” he answered for himself with a heavy sigh his hand dropping away from his face in defeat.

“Well no one asked you to! If you hadn’t gotten in the way then Allura and I would be spending some quality time together right now!” Lance huffed swinging his arms out for emphasis, or at least he tried to, his right arm swung above his head but his left arm only got as far as the short chain between the handcuffs that bound him to Shiro allowed. Lance’s arm was pulled back with a sharp yank of the cuff around his wrist while Shiro's Galra arm didn’t budge an inch.

“Ouch,” Lance grumbled wrapping his free hand around his now sore wrist as much as the thick metal cuff would allow.

Shiro glanced over at Lance finding it hard to feel any pity for the other boy when this was all his fault in the first place. Where Lance had found a pair of handcuffs on the castle ship Shiro didn’t know and didn’t really care to, but with Lance's penchant for being captured and tied up he supposed he really shouldn’t be surprised.

When Lance strode into the dining room with forced, false nonchalance Shiro knew something was up. Lance had been doing a very poor job of covering the fact he’d been hiding something behind his back when he sat next to Allura which only made Shiro even more suspicious.

Lance started off with his usual flirting, both distracting and annoying the princess as she brushed him off her usual fashion. She hadn’t seen the flash of silver around Lance’s right wrist when he lifted his arm, but Shiro had. It was only thanks to the fact Shiro had been sitting on Allura’s other side that he was able to throw his arm over in time to protect the slender wrist Lance had been aiming for.

Shiro only just began to realise the full extent of when he'd gotten himself into when the silver cuff locked around his wrist.

After several minuted of indignant shouting on Lance’s part, some words of disappointment from Shiro and stern scolding from Allura Lance had been quick to agree to uncuff them. Or at least he would have if he hadn’t (conveniently) lost the key. Thus began the long search to find it.

The cuffs were much like the pair Nyma had used to chain Lance to the tree though the chain between them was much shorter and thrummed with a low, ominous pulse of energy. When the key didn't immediately turn up Keith, short on patience, had suggested severing the chain between the cuff with his bayard so they could just put an end to it right then. The suggestion had been met with an alarmed squawk from Lance who had worried the cuffs might electrocute them, or far worse, if tampered with. Allura hadn’t been sure what would happen either, although the cuffs were clearly alien and had apparently been found on the ship she had no idea how they worked either so they'd all agreed to hunt for the key a little longer instead.

By the end of the day the key still hadn't appeared and it was getting late which meant, Lance insisted, it was time for bed. He needed his beauty sleep and he didn't want to disturb Shiro's sleep either, a point that Lance had been strangely insistent and apologetic on.

“You shouldn't lose sleep because of me. We can look for the key again in the morning,” Lance said stubbornly. Shiro, not able to admit that he rarely slept much anyway, hadn't been able to come up with a good enough argument which meant Lance won which led to their current predicament. How they were going to settle the sleeping arrangements.

“Take the bed. I’ll sit on the floor, I can sleep anywhere so I’ll manage for one night,” Shiro sighed thinking that that was the perfect solution. It would allow Lance to get his much wanted rest and Shiro would be able to stay awake all night without Lance noticing, he couldn't risk falling asleep with the other boy in the room. Shiro could stay awake and Lance would get the bed, Lance couldn't argue with that.

Except that he could.

“What man no I can’t let you do that it’s your bed. Plus what if you like accidentally pull on my arm and drag me off the bed in your sleep? I’ll sleep on the floor,” Lance answered back emphatically.

“I don't move about in my sleep and I'm fine with the floor so it’s fine. I don’t mind,” Shiro said with a hint of tension to his voice which he hoped Lance wouldn't notice, that he would just accept his generosity without question.

But of course it was Lance, and Lance for all his flaws was a self sacrificing idiot who put the comfort of others above his own. He refused to accept Shiro's kindness.

“No no no, I mean this is kinda my fault. I lost the key after all,” he said sheepishly hanging his head in a bashful way. Shiro narrowed his eyes at the brunet, this more more than 'kinda' Lance's fault, but he decided not to say any more. He would have plenty of time to discipline the other when they were freed.

“Lance,” he said instead his tone sharp and authoritative, not quit an order but just a step below it. For a moment it seemed to work as Lance squirmed again, looking as if he were about to give in before struggling through some internal conflict to speak again.

“Well I mean...we could just share the bed and that would solve everything,” Lance said in a breathless rush a tinge of pink illuminating his cheeks.

“What!?” Shiro yelped sounding far more horrified than he had reason to be at the suggestion. A look of hurt flashed across Lance’s face taking Shiro’s exclamation the wrong way because of course how else would he take it? He had no idea Shiro was terrified of the thought of sharing a bed with someone, of thrashing about in his sleep and hurting them or having them witness him during one of his nightmares and the state he would be in after.

“Sorry it was just a thought,” Lance said his voice small, shoulders hunched. He wouldn't look at Shiro.

“Its just I have a lot of siblings 'ya know so I’m used to sharing a bed sometimes so it’s not really weird or anything but I guess if you don't have siblings or whatever it is weird, right? Sorry.” Lance muttered to his feet, tentatively glancing at Shiro of the corner of his eye. His eyes were deep, blue and so sad, his expression a mixture of innocence and hurt as he tried to explain himself. It made Shiro's heart ache.

“I’m sorry it’s not that. It’s just been a while since I shared a bed with someone and we are both adults now, so...you know...” Shiro said with a sincere smile and a hint of a bashful blush because aside from the fact that he was anxious about his nightmares being discovered, the prospect of sharing a bed with someone his own age, who wasn't related to him, was rather embarrassing.

“Well I promise to keep my hands to myself if you do,” Lance shot back with a grin his usual bravado back full force.

Shiro groaned but again he couldn't think of any excuses to say no without revealing the truth about his nightmares so he had no choice but to let Lance lead him towards the bed.

Lance moved carefully, tugging gently on Shiro's wrist as he sat himself down on the bed first kicking off his shoes before pulling his legs up. Of course neither of them could get changed with their arms cuffed together so they would have to spend the night in their regular clothes. Lance shuffled across the bed moving until his back was pressed firmly against the wall. He lay on his side the arm connected to Shiro stretched out in front of him a sheepish smile on his lips.

“Now you can lie down on your back or your side or whatever's comfortable,” Lance smiled up at Shiro patting the generous space still left on the single bed. Lance had pressed himself right up against the wall making himself as small as possible. He really didn’t look comfortable.

“Are you sure you have enough space? I don’t need to lie on my back or anything you can move over a bit,” Shiro offered as he sat down on the bed first before moving very carefully, and slowly to lie down beside the brunet eventually lying on his side to face Lance. He would have turned onto his other side to make things less awkward but their joint arms, lying on the bed the only barrier between them, made that difficult.

“Yeah I’m fine,” Lance answered his voice just a little high.

They were lying face to face, so close that they could feel the other breath against their face. Shiro could feel just how hot Lance's breath was, and the nervous hitch in it.

“Hehe this is quite cosy though huh?” Lance chuckled as he attempted to shuffle into more comfortable position his gaze wandering in an attempt to not look directly at Shiro, which was practically impossible.

“Yeah this is...um...cosy,” Shiro said hesitantly suddenly realising just how intimate the situation was.

“We should sleep!” He exclaimed loudly and a little more forcefully than he intended making Lance jump next to him. Luckily Lance was feeling just as awkward as he was and was quick to agree.

“Oh yeah sleep right. Good night Shiro,” he said in a rush before closing his eyes, screwing them shut so tight his whole face scrunched up in a way that was clearly not restful. His whole body was tense too, at this rate it would be a long time before Lance fell asleep, if at all.

But they needed to try, and if Shiro pretended to sleep then maybe Lance would eventually relax and fall asleep too. So Shiro screwed his own eyes shut trying not to focus on how hot the air was between them, how their breath mingled together and he could practically taste Lance on his lips.

Shiro’s eyes snapped open. Lance’s face was so close, still scrunched up uncomfortably, and even if Shiro shuffled back it wouldn’t put enough distance between them.

“Maybe I will lie one my back after all. Just give me a shove if you need more room.” Shiro said before rolling over shifting as close to the edge of the bed as he dared. They were still pressed close, closer now even. Lance was curled up against his side his body heat seeping into him making Shiro glad they hadn't bothered with blankets. But even with the added closeness this position felt more comfortable, less awkward and intimate. He felt Lance relax next to him immediately.

“Ok,” Lance answered softly.

It was, Shiro thought to himself as he stared up at the dark blank ceiling, going to be a very long night.

Shiro of course wouldn’t sleep, couldn’t sleep, but lying in a dark room trying to keep himself awake was nothing new and at least this time he didn’t have the impending threat of Galra soldiers turning up at any moment to take him away who knew where. Instead the only thing he had to contend with was making sure Lance never found out about the nightmares that plagued him when he did actually sleep.

So Shiro let his mind wander focusing on anything that might keep him awake. His thoughts first went to battle strategy running through various drills and battles in his mind. He thought over some of their previous training session remembering what had worked well and what hadn't, considering how things he be improved he made quick mental notes of things to try next time. If he was going to stay awake all night he may as well be productive.

When his attention began to slip he found his mind wandering to thoughts of his family, friends, people he'd left behind. When he realised the dark trail his thoughts were taking Shiro was quick to focus on something else all the while keeping a careful ear on Lance listening to the boys rhythmic breathing and the way he shifted in his sleep. The presences of another person so close like that was oddly soothing, and made it much harder for Shiro to stay awake.

For a few hours Lance slept peacefully and Shiro thought he might just get through the night without any incident. At some point he felt the fingers dancing across his chest, light and innocent at first making him think that Lance was just moving in his sleep, that he would settle down soon. Then the touches became firmer, more deliberate but still with an air of shyness that made Shiro catch his breath.

“Hey Shiro, you are asleep right?” Lance whispered his voice softer and more gentle than Shiro had ever heard it. He sounded fond and almost sad and though Shiro knew he should probably answer something in Lance’s voice stopped him.

“Good,” he continued after a long pause in which Shiro didn’t answer. Shiro lost his chance to say anything so he focused instead on keeping his eyes closed, his breathing soft and even as if he were asleep.

“You see I have a confession to make, it’s bugging me so much that I can’t sleep,” Lance mumbled to himself his hand moving slowly back and forth across Shiro’s chest tracing the solid line of muscle of Shiro's chest that was on full display through the close fitting t-shirt. The touch made Shiro’s breath hitch, made his pulse race as he fought to keep his breathing calm and even. The touch was so gentle, tender in a way that made Shiro realize he hadn’t experienced something like this in so long.

“Well I mean this situation too makes sleeping kinda hard, lying next to you, but it's not just that,” Lance laughed his voice jumpy as he curled closer his head pressing against Shiro's shoulder. His hand splayed across Shiro’s chest, his fingers tense in a way that made Shiro worry Lance might stop and pull his hand away, but after a moment of hesitation Lance kept his hand there, moving his fingers in the same gentle, tender way.

“You see I was aiming to chain you with these cuffs all along. I knew if you saw me approaching Allura with them you’d step in so I figured it was worth a try,” he said sheepishly. Shiro could feel Lance’s smile pressed against his shoulder. But then Lance sighed, the sad tone coming back and Shiro felt how Lance sagged against him.

“I just wanted to spend some time with you, that's all. I only ever get to interact with you during training or a missions, I’m really not worth your time otherwise I know that but….” Lance’s voice trembled a little and Shiro felt his chest ache again. It was true that he hardly spent any time with Lance outside training and missions, didn’t make much time for his fellow teammates but it wasn’t because he thought Lance wasn’t good enough or that he didn't want to spend time with him, not at all.

“I really like you Shiro,” Lance whispered even quieter freezing Shiro’s thoughts in their tracks.

“Like 'like like' you so you know it really sucks when I think how you might not even like me as a friend, that I’m just a screw up, so I just wanted to keep you to myself for a bit. But I guess pulling dumb shit like this isn't really the answer is it? Now you're just going to think I'm even more of an idiot,” Lance's voice grew sad and bitter, angry at himself. How Lance couldn't feel Shiro's racing heart beat against his fingers Shiro had no idea but he was relived the other hadn't noticed he was awake. He wasn't sure how to answer Lance right then, what words he could possibly say to make things better so he moved on instinct instead.

Turning towards Lance he wrapped his free arm around him, pulling the other toward him in a tight hug.

“Shiro! You’re awake?!” Lance hissed alarmed tensing in Shiro's arms, he sounded so afraid then that Shiro squeezed him tighter curing himself around Lance. Shiro kept up the act his eyes closed, breathing steady as he feigned sleep.

After several long moments of silence and no sign from Shiro that he was awake Lance relaxed in Shiro's grip.

“You really are asleep?” Lance hissed under his breath sounding as if he hardly dared believe it. He held his breath for a moment, waited then when nothing else happened he let it out in a big, relieved huff.

“Oh man don't scare me like that,” he groaned curling closer to Shiro.

“Oh ok. So you’re a cuddler huh?” He hummed to himself. His hand was trapped between them now pressed against Shiro's chest but that didn't stop him touching Shiro. He drummed his fingers against the other's chest instead, his touch slow and still so gentle. He didn't try to move away or get out of Shiro's  hold instead he continued to snuggle closer deciding to enjoy the moment while it lasted.  

“I really do love you you know,” he whispered softly, his voice muffled with sleep. Shiro was sure his breath hitched then but luckily Lance was too preoccupied to notice.

He held Lance all night even after the other had fallen asleep. Shiro tucked his head against the top of Lance's head, the short fluffy hair tickling his nose letting him smell Lance's shampoo. He focused on Lance, the feeling of the other boy in his arms helping to focus his mind and keeping him awake better than any mental training exercise could. Holding Lance close like this, their bodies pressed so close, there was no way Shiro would ever be able to relax enough to sleep. Lance was soft and supple against him, curling into him, moulding into the curve of his body letting Shiro wrap himself around the brunet even more, get closer.

Their joint arms pressed awkward between them, hands trapped against their things. It made Shiro wonder how it would feel to wrap both arms around Lance. Hold him closer. When Lance started to get restless, not a bad dream but still on the verge of waking Shiro rubbed his back, drawing small soothing circles he whispered soft, nonsense words until Lance settled down again, pressing his lips to the top of Lance’s head experimentally just to see how it would make him feel. It made Shiro giddy.

Lying in bed together, holding Lance close probably wasn’t really the best time to examine what his feelings might be for Lance, what Lance’s confession that he wasn't even supposed to have heard in the first place might mean, so he focused instead on what he’d done to make Lance think that he didn’t like him at all.

He was he supposed a little harsh on Lance, usually berating him for his behaviour rather than praising the things he did right. And most of the things Shiro scolded him for he supposed were minor, inconsequential things, like the terrible flirting or making loud siren noises. Shiro figured he could probably afford to loosen up a bit.

And he did play favourites, a little, Shiro realised. He was not a perfect leader and most of his attention went on either Keith or Pidge. Out of all of them Keith was the one he’d known the longest, he was a very important and close friend. And Pidge was Matt’s sister, he felt responsible for her. Lance, on the surface, seemed as if he was ok and that he didn’t needed any support from Shiro and the others but Shiro was starting to see that that was probably a front, a convincing act. He was ashamed it had taken him so long to notice. And there was Hunk too, Hunk who had probably been the most scared out of all of them at the start but Shiro’s focus had been too much on Pidge then to offer the support he probably should have. Shiro had let his team down.

He needed to be a better, and fairer leader he resolved. And when he’d done that, showed Lance that he did think of him as a valuable friend maybe then he could look back on the feelings bubbling inside him bought to light by Lance’s confession.

As the time for them to wake up drew closer Shiro slowly released his hold, shuffling back a little so Lance could push him away or pull back if he wanted to when he woke up, but he kept his arm draped over Lance’s waist unable to let go completely. He closed his eyes, feigning sleep again he waited for Lance to wake.

Some time later Shiro felt Lance stir, heard him yawn and felt his body stretch out against him. Feeling Shiro's arm still over him Lance froze for a moment but then seemed to relax when he realised Shiro was still asleep.

“So I guess that wasn’t a dream….” he whispered his fingers brushing against the line of Shiro’s jaw before moving to his shoulder. His touch lingered for a moment and Shiro felt him lean closer, almost as if he were tempted to do something but then Lance thought better of it and moved back.

“Man I’m glad you didn’t wake up,” he laughed his hand moving to Shiro’s shoulder gently pushing the older male onto his back Shiro’s arm sliding of his waist. Shiro’s fingers twitched, wanting for a moment to curl around Lance and not let go. But no he was supposed to be asleep, he couldn’t give the game away.

Lance settled down beside him, moving away a little so there was a sliver of space between them, so things were normal.

“I think that might have been the best nights sleep of my entire life,” Lance said, stretching out again moving the arm joined to Shiro as much as he could trying to chase away the ache in it.

“You know I’m surprised you didn’t wake up before me? I didn’t think you were the type to sleep in,” Lance teased, nudging Shiro gently. Shiro was still to tense to answer. Was it too soon to 'wake up'?

“Should I wake you up?” Lance mused to himself shifting again beside Shiro as he tried to get comfortable.

Deciding that he should ‘wake up’ before Lance started to spill his heart again Shiro slowly opened his eyes, blinking sleepily probably hamming up his act of ‘waking up’ a little too much in his effort to be convincing.

“Morning!” Lance chimed brightly, apparently not noticing. Shiro had gotten away with it.

“Good morning,” Shiro tilted his head to the side offering Lance what he hoped was a normal, easy smile.

“So should we get up now?” Lance asked awkwardly lifting the arm joined to Shiro.

“Yeah. We should get some breakfast, but first I have an idea,” Shiro chuckled with a cryptic grin at Lance's curious expression. He didn't answer the questioning look right away moving first to get out of the bed, careful not to pull on Lane's wrist as the other followed. They had to move carefully, still so close together as the cuffs gave them little room to move away from each other. When they were on their feet Shiro quickly, before he lost his nerve, grabbed Lance's hand.

“Shiro?!” Lance squeaked in surprise his voice going a few octaves higher than usual making Shiro laugh dispelling his nervousness.

“This will make moving about easier, now we won't pull on each others wrists,” Shiro explained innocently, as if he hadn't noticed how flustered Lance was. Lance nodded mutely but was still looking at Shiro as if he'd lost his mind.

“Anyway I was thinking this might a good training exercise too,” Shiro said brightly lifting their joint hands, giving them a little shake to make the cuffs rattle.

“And how would this be a good training exercise, exactly?” Lance asked his face red, voice cracking though he was doing his best to play it cool. It was rather sweet how flustered he was getting just from holding hands, especially with how tenderly he'd been touching Shiro during the night when he thought the other was asleep. It was enough to make Shiro want to tease Lance just a little more, keep that pretty blush on his cheeks just a little longer.

“I was thinking maybe we could try some sparring like this. You never know when you might need to fight your way out of a situation like this.”

“A situation like someone accidentally cuffing themselves to someone else?” Lance asked doubtfully.

“Not quite,” Shiro chuckled, “but you may get captured and have someone try to cuff you or restrain you like this or in some other way. It’s good to learn to fight with a handicap, with limited mobility. So would you like to join me in the training room?” Shiro offered watching as Lance’s expression lit up his embarrassed confusion gone in a flash.

“You mean you and me? Sure that sounds great!” Lance practically bounced on his toes in his excitement.

“And maybe some exercise will help jog your memory, you know help you remember where you left the key,” Shiro added slyly. Lance looked away ruefully.

“Yeah you never know, it might help.” He hummed avoiding Shiro's gaze.

The training session was more fun than serious with the two of them stumbling over themselves as Shiro tried to show Lance some moves he could use while he had one arm pinned. It was a bit of a mess and ended up with them falling into each other or on the floor more often than they were stood upright and although Lance probably learned very little from it Shiro figured that was ok. They were laughing, and bonding in a way that a straight forward training session would never allow and Shiro found he actually rather enjoyed it.

“What are they doing?” Hunk hissed from the doorway, both he and Keith watching them from the doorway. Neither Shiro or Lance had noticed their audience.

“I think Shiro is flirting with Lance,” Keith shrugged turning away missing the slack jawed look of surprise on Hunk's face.

“Just leave them to it, I'm not getting in between that,” Keith called over his shoulder. Hunk followed silently.

The training session ended only when they realised they'd missed breakfast so they hurried back, and if he thought Lance suddenly remembering where they key was along the way was suspicious Shiro didn't comment on it.